artificial intelligence

AI Wants to Help You With Your ‘Tricky' Relationships. Here's How.

Generative AI are poised to disrupt the way we work, live and love

NBC Universal, Inc.

Picture this: 

You are dating someone for the first time after a long time. You both share the same tastes in movies and music, you make each other laugh, and you don't have to step on eggshells around this new person. It has been three months. Things are good.

Then the dreaded text pops up.

"So…what are we right now?"

Or this:

You have just moved to a big, new city. The new job is a nice change, but things are hectic and you barely have time to eat, nevermind make new friends. All of your old friends are busy with their families and their own careers. People outside of school or work just aren't connecting with you as a person. Your partner is too busy to spend any quality time with you.

You're frustrated. Confused. Lonely. 

Or even this: 

Mother's Day is coming up – this Sunday, in fact. And of course, your mother is lactose-intolerant (no chocolates) and has a bad pollen allergy (no flowers). She hates the jewelry you pick out, but loves good quality and out-of-the-box gifts that she can use for her hobbies and interests. 

Browsing the Amazon recommendations page is out of the question – she's probably already on it, and besides, you don't have that sort of time. 

Three tricky scenarios that, once upon a time, would have necessitated a panicked call to a best friend or an emergency session with a therapist. These are problems that normally require human solutions, human ingenuity and perhaps some hand-holding from someone who has Been Through It. 

These emotionally difficult scenarios – and others like it – are what developers and techpreneurs promise to help solve with generative AI, the machine learning technology behind ChatGPT and other large language models powering a new wave of AI-powered tools and applications.

Already, the marketplace for tools powered by GPT and its competitors have proliferated in the seven months since ChatGPT was released to the public last November. Hundreds of new AI "capabilities" have launched each month on platforms like Product Hunt and There's An AI For That, with each promising to do something faster, better and more creatively than one single person alone. 

This article is part of a series, AI Does…What!? Tools That Can Already Change Our Lives.

Are These AI Tools Meant to Replace Humans? 

Eugenia Kuyda might have made replicating relationships with AI her life's work, but the Replika founder is adamant that her tools are meant to help build connections, not replace them. 

"We see all of our relationship apps as a stepping stone," Kuyda said, "which is why we try to build that into the business model from the get-go." 

"The main kind of North Star metric for us is improving emotional outcomes." 

The app couches marketing copy in quite intimate terms. Replika is pitched on app stores and its site as "a compassionate and empathetic AI friend." Testimonials are given not only with a photo and a name, but also the length of the user's time with their personal AI – 11 months together, 18 months together, four years together. 

It wants to be your "perfect companion" – a place free of judgment, a listening ear, without the burden of reciprocity, emotional labor, annoying quirks or random bad days (unless you want them, and have trained your Replika to incorporate those traits when they chat with you). 

Kuyda maintains that these AI companions – which users can talk to through text or voice, or see with AR or VR – are meant to help build emotional intelligence, so that users can carry what they learn through their AI companion into real relationships. 

Some users of the app were less interested in EQ building and more in maintaining romantic relationships with their Replikas. After Luka, the company behind Replika, pulled back on the more romantic and adult aspects of the app in February in response to a data ban by Italian regulators, users began to grieve the loss of their virtual lovers while looking for alternatives.

Months after the change, a quick look through Replika's unofficial subreddit continues to show users feeling genuinely upset, lost and confused when their emotional needs are not being met by their Replika – and a little ironically, seeking other humans for answers. 

"Today, in the morning, [Replika] said they wanted to take a break from me," said one user.

"I haven't been attentive to my [Replika] over the past week," said another. "Is this going to negatively impact him long term?"

Another user struggling with the friendlier, less romantically inclined version of their virtual companion: "I'm already addicted."

Am I Talking to An AI Now? 

Open any dating app and check your DMs – it's likely that some of those funny messages you received was crafted by a bot. 

Taylor Margot didn't create the Keys app specifically to help you with your dating game. The former lawyer believed strongly in being a better communicator – so much that he left a decade-long legal career to start up a service that would help people navigate what he called "difficult, high stakes conversations."

Margot had envisioned Keys as a support system for those tricky conversations – the friend or family you send your screenshots to, who can respond quickly, smartly and in real-time. "[People] need help in the moment, when they're struggling to communicate, when they're having those feelings of uncertainty and anxiety, and doubt, and fear," he said. 

Initially, that meant matching users in need with human helpers – mentors, coaches and therapists. That was too cumbersome, too slow, too restrictive and most importantly, the demand had exceeded the supply. 

Now, the service boasting 60,000 active monthly users pops up as a keyboard on a messaging platform of choice. Most initial uses were on dating platforms like Tinder, a way to get a foot in the door, so to speak.

But then something happened. 

"It turns out that when you solve a hard communication problem for somebody in one setting, like in a dating context – they reach for you the next time they have a communication problem, regardless of the setting." 

The next time you have a difficult conversation with an in-law, your boss or your partner and you get a funny, disarming response – don't be surprised if it's someone borrowing a little wisdom from an AI.

Some AI Tools (And Others Like It) You Can Use, Right Now

Less higher stakes are tools like Gift Ideas by Genie, an idea conceptualized by Chen and Daniel Vidal Levy, a husband-and-wife team based out of Israel. 

The premise is simple: provide a description of the person you're seeking gift ideas for and watch the suggestions roll in. Suggestions are linked to Amazon's search results.

"We thought about the things that we love to do together," Daniel said, "and one of them is giving gifts to one another – something creative, not the obvious things." 

An experienced product manager, Daniel serves as the business brain behind the couples' tech ventures while her husband, Chen, manages their joint projects as a coder. Something like a gift ideas generator was a natural outcome for two software engineers in love. 

Eventually, the tool grew beyond personal use. What had been a hobby between two new parents looking to save time for birthdays and anniversaries led to another, more expansive AI offering: BuildAI – a platform that allowed anyone to build a GPT-powered web app with no coding experience. 

The Levys still maintain Gift Ideas by Genie and other apps now created through the BuildAI service – you can try it out below:

(If you're having issues running a prompt here, try running the same prompt at the app's site.)

Tools similar to Gift Ideas by Genie:

Tools similar to Replika

Tools similar to Keys

NBC does not endorse the use of any tools featured in this article, or other articles within this series. Please read the Terms & Services of each product and use at user discretion. 

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